I have to admit that my posting on this blog is sporadic – to say the least. But the things is that I’m a busy girl. And I am not going to make any promises to any one about posting more often because this is, and should be, one of the things in my life that is free from pressure – completely. That is also why I remain anonymous. I don’t think that it matters who I am in this case. See me as a fictional character if you want. I want to be personal because there is no point in writing if you’re not personal but I feel that I cannot be personal if I have to reveal who I am. If I ever published a book I’d most likely have a pen-name.
Anyway, I am now busy with revision and deadlines but I am still (mostly) happy. I’ve reached that state where I mostly cry when I have PMS or when I am really tired but I don’t cry at everything every single day which is a lot better for me and the people around me. I think it is important to cry since it is my way of letting things out so therefore I am not going to be too hard on myself when I cry because of tiredness or hormones.
I look forward to summer and think the fact that I will be finished with exams and MY SECOND YEAR AT UNIVERSITY in just under a month is both the best thing that has ever happened to me but also quite terrifying. I used to always be that person who liked school and though summer holidays were boring but that was when I found school very easy and when school meant I could see my friends every day. This year ‘school’ or studying has been harder, not in content really but in the amount of stuff I’ve been asked to read, and most of my best friends are in a different country. And I have to cook and clean and adult all by myself. I’m not lying when I say that I need this break.
This past year I’ve been so busy (emotionally and uni-wise) so that I’ve stopped reading things not on the course list, stopped writing things that are not essays and stopped drawing/painting completely. That is not good and I want to make sure that the approaching summer will be a time where I can do those things again and enjoy them.